Seriously, folks...

If you have to set your cell phone to some obnoxious ring (and why do you have to? REALLY) please, please, please remember to turn it off before you attend an event.


Especially if said event has announcements before reminding you to do so. What, you think no one will call you? THEY WILL. And then we all have to be dragged out of the play/movie by some annoying song that made you feel clever when you set it ("I'm going to give Steve that 50 cent song! How witty is that??"), watch you realize that it's your bag/pocket making that noise, have to hear it amplified as you bring it out, and then have to listen to some sort of tone as you finally shut off the phone which you should have done before the show like we asked you to!


And inevitably you won't really turn off the phone at first, you'll just "ignore" the call. So the person will call you back. Lather, rinse, repeat. Not to mention how incredibly bright the cell phone screen is. Makes you easy to pick out of a crowd, I'll give you that.


People complain about youngsters and cell phones, and while I admit that not being able to enjoy a concert without the light of 10,000 pre-teen ADD texters is annoying, in my opinion old people are far worse. Trust me, from my little perch in the booth, I see a lot of old people pretending not to hear their cell phones as they go off during a show. And then arguing with their spouses about turning the damn thing off. And then trying to remember how to turn it off. Or worse, they answer it. Always before they've left the theater completely, though. Yes, we can still hear you say "Hello? I'm at the theater. Hold on..." in what you think is a theatrical stage whisper.


Turn the damn things off and leave them off for a couple of hours. Your hectic life will return to you in full soon enough, but can't you let that all go for just a little while? The rest of us would surely appreciate it.


Not to mention that the actors onstage and those of us behind the scenes are working really hard to create an illusion. But of course, you're very important. Your fellow audience members obviously don't know WHO you ARE.


Mostly, though, it's just really fucking annoying.