Philadelphia New Year's Resolutions

I would like to propose a few New Year's Resolutions for the citizens of Philadelphia and for the people who run the city government. You know, just a few small things that all of us can do to make our city a kinder, gentler place.

I'll start with my resolutions for the citizens of our fair city:

1. Stop with the littering, already. I can't tell you how many times I've seen people throw trash out of their car windows or just toss wrappers into storm grates. It makes our neighborhood look run-down and trashy.


2. Clean up after your dogs, seriously. I nearly step in poo every day, and not just at the park, either. I often see dog turds just chillin' in the middle of the sidewalk. They can't all be from strays! And on a similar note, get.your.friggin.dog.on.a.leash. I don't care how good they "normally", are-- an unleashed dog is a danger to other people, other dogs and themselves! (I'll ask you to spay and neuter your dogs next year.)


3. Stop signs mean that you STOP YOUR CAR. This Philly slide thing is dangerous and irritating. Coming to a 4-way stop in Philadelphia is nothing but a game of chicken-- who can roll furthest into the intersection, forcing the other car to stop or get hit? And there is very little regard for pedestrians-- I've had countless cars roll through stop signs, almost right into my knees. (This resolution is for me too. I've fallen into the Philly slide myself lately) And on a related note: drivers, be nicer to bicyclists. We have a right to the road too-- it's the law.


4. Text messaging or taking a phone call during a theatrical performance is never appropriate. It's rude during a movie showing, too-- and if you're not careful, this could happen to you in Philadelphia. (Thank god the man didn't die, but I must point out that this happened mere blocks away from my house)



5. Blocking an entire street with your car while you unload groceries/talk to your neighbors/score a girl's phone number/purchase drugs is just plain rude. Just because you have your flashers on doesn't mean you get to do whatever the fuck you like with your car.


And for the city government, here are a few things I'd like you to get on this year:

1. This city needs regular street cleaning and snow plowing. Plus lots more trash cans on the street.


2. More bike lanes! More places to park bikes! More bike-friendly community education! More ticketing of cars parked in bike lanes!


3. These proposed budget cuts suck. Closing down libraries? Cancelling the New Year's Parade? These things are going to lead to more problems for the city, not fewer. And for that matter, let's keep casinos out of the city. That's the sort of traffic/criminal element we don't need. Instead let's support the arts to encourage visitors to check out our city. The cost of a theater ticket or museum admission is so much less than losing your shirt to a casino. People will appreciate that.



Okay, that's all I have for now. What are some New Year's resolutions you would like to see the residents of your city and the city itself make?